Even though I’m quite a reserved person, there are some things that give birth to nervousness within me….
Being the person that I am, I’m not that open to new experiences and if I want to experience new ones, it feels like my mind already has planned all of the outcomes even before I am to undergo the “Said” experience…
For example;
I once went to a theatrical play and I was running late, I had a fixed seat which I booked a few weeks in advance.
On reaching there a little late, the host had already opened with the introductions.
…….
As I entered and looked for my seat and saw someone else sitting in mine, on telling them this was my seat,
He told me he had a seat in the middle somewhere which he booked outside the hall, can I take that one..?
On telling him that I couldn’t because I booked this seat weeks prior and I will sit here;
Nervousness creeped in as he didn’t get up even after asking politely, and after that in a stern voice, after a few moments the staff came in as he stated to raise his voice against me.
Knowing this was a public place, and they reserved the right for our admission, as I showed them the ticket and he was politely told to go to his seat, which he refused.
On pausing the play for a moment all the lights were lit, and the said person was told to move to his seat or to be escorted out of the venue by security.
The smug look on his face now wiped clean as he murmured something in his mouth and squeezed himself to his seat in the middle..
That thing made me quite nervous.
But thankfully I booked in advance and the staff were really helpful…!
Overall, A good day that was.
Apart from me losing my sh|t there.
Cheers 🥂
Love Waakiye
The first pic I took as I reached the destination after transversing through roads that were small and had a great abyss on the other side; the hazy memories of those times stay just like these pictures in my mind!!!
Describe a positive thing a family member has done for you.
Hey,
I hope you all are doing well…!
This is a basic idea The relatives (from your extended family) are the absolute worst people because they pray for your downfall, just because you’re doing a bit better than them..
But,
There’s a cousin sister that I have; She has been an absolute blessing for me because she has been there for me at times when I couldn’t write or do anything..!
It was her who pushed me into this direction; to write to be expressive to read more books, To write random scribbles that come to my mind, I still have that old notebook with me where all of this began…
It was her in our family who pursued English honors and masters and has a good job educating students,
To be honest even I became a student of her’s in this way, and learnt a lot, She bought me G0d knows how many books some of which are still left unread, but all of this- Planting a seed of this writer belongs to her and the nurturing of it belongs to yours truly…
It has been quite a while that i sent her some of my work that i wrote these past few weeks sometimes i upload it on platforms other than this blog, but this is a place i can certainly call mine and be truly expressive without any boundaries;
And i really thank the powers involved and my curious mind for being on the toes and always ready to learn something new, just for the heck of it…
Cheers 🥂
Love Waakiye
A canvas blank this world is, the thoughts and ideas that exist beyond the horizons of our mind, always a quest to conquer, this ever going conquest called our life…
Theres a reason I don’t go without a face mask outside my house, I might not be popular in any way but I have a lot of people that recognize me from way back, and to be honest being disregarded for being myself for the last two years, I chose to cut everyone but two, they’re my brothers and i shall till the end of time be available for them because they were too…
This is something that happened 8 years back and i still remember it crystal clear as it happened just yesterday…
There was a program that was supposed to take place in our high school and being one of those who was supposed to be a part of the management (student board), it was mine and this one girl’s duty to manage the smooth flow of the entire program without any complications;
Tbh I have been the type of person who loves to work alone, that way I can control all the variables and get the work done faster than having to spend time discussing and waiting for a half-baked response that would have no base or wouldn’t even have any concrete base…
Thats the type of person i was back then still am…
It was the schedule of this program we were told four weeks in advance that it was supposed to take place, and we were to work however we could within the school provided budget, so there were these 3 weekends that were in between the date we were told it was supposed to take place thinking we had enough time i took it to myself to budget, thinking of equipment that we’d require and had to acquire and all the technical things…
During our lunch break a girl from the board visited me being from the other stream, on enquiring about what was needed she told me to come to the cafeteria area during the last period if it was free, coincidentally it was free as the teacher that we had was on leave during that time;
On finding her waiting, the cute face, cat eyed glasses, grey and white school dress, and simplistic watch on her left hand in which she held an apple which she was gnawing on every other minute;
Being the socially awkward person I was back then, I just came up to her and put my bag down in front of her, we exchanged greetings and i asked “if the was something that she needed from the cafeteria?”
On hearing my offer,she thought to herself a bottle of apple ocean would be nice…! I said okay and got up and went to the stall that had what we needed…
As i returned with two coffees and a bottle of electrolyte water, she was surprised of sorts, no-one brought her things she said on a whim, but she did thank me for it…
As we began discussing the plan, how and what we would need for the smooth flow of the plan, before any other thing could leave her mouth, I handed her the document requiring all of the stuff needed, all the people that we needed to contact and along with it their contact details, and minimum budget required for all of the things and with them the alternatives if the one mentioned weren’t available;
Reading the document of 10 pages and in awe of me she asked “if i knew this was supposed to take place weeks before because all of us were told yesterday only…?
Yeah i told her slyly as i already knew something like this was supposed to happen around this time watching it from last 3 years and all of our seniors butchered it ruthlessly…
So I prepared it weeks before and finalized it yesterday, … There was silence for a few minutes as she scanned the document, and in awe she looked at me the moments after as I had cracked open my cold coffee and began sipping it;
How…? How do you already have things ready on which we have to spend the next week and a half…? We have all that we want and need, for the entirety of the plan, all that remains is going to the places, negotiating and buying the things that are needed, which could be done over this weekend…!!!
How did you manage all of this that too all on your own…?
That’s how it has been from the past 1.5 years, I’ve given my very best and you know how smooth the fest has taken place the last year too…
Before coming to you, I submitted a copy to the president of the student board and the teacher in charge too…
Is there something else that you needed…?
NO, I mean yeah, I thought we’d spent time jotting down things needed and spend actual time buying and arranging all of the items and such…
That is something that can be left on the teachers and upper management, the final negotiation and things are to be approved by them only..!
I pushed the other coffee that I bought towards her and as she opened it her face sulking as she took a sip out of it…
Having zero clue what has happened and what was supposed to happen, as the last bell rang, marking the day to be over…
I started to pack my things, As I told her, “there’s an afternoon class that I am supposed to take, and if i didn’t leave within 10 minutes I’d be late to that…”
Having no clue what has happened, she also packed her bag and started to stand up and walk towards the gate with me…
And on reaching outside the gate, my path went to the left and Her’s to the right,
In a low voice she hummed, “If you wouldn’t have done all of that we could spend the weekend discussing and planning all of it over the weekend at each other’s place or some cafe…”
HUH?, I asked, is there something that you’d like to add or remove from the list, maybe we can discuss it over call or something…?
Her mind running haywire that her plans were spoiled, She ignored my last line.. (My mind thinking she was trying to leech off my work just by being seen with me working on something…)
As we parted ways, She began walking down her and I went down mine, She met one of her friends and I met one of mine, Looking back at each other our eyes met…
NEVER TO MEET AGAIN..
(How stupid it was of me…)
Cheers🥂 (To the fool I was back then…)
………….
“Ever had a moment like this , when you realized something too late? Drop a comment, I’d love to hear your version of what could’ve been.“
Love Waakiye
This is exactly how I walked my way back home that day and whenever I remember how much I fumbled back then….
Hey, how are you guys doing? i hope all of you are doing well…
Do you ever wonder why we feel an urge to unwind, why are we so overworked, why do we feel dead when we return home, indulge in some vices, eat and then fall asleep…?
Thats what the essence of us humans have been reduced to..?
I’m talking from experience I get up around 7 and do my morning routine, and when i look up its around time to leave for work, tripping over things in a rush i get ready and leave for work, where i endlessly tire myself for 10+ hours 6 days a week…
I mean if that’s what i have to do to earn my keep i shall do it till the end of time or the end of me…
But, the unwinding from the day’s stresses has a lot of meaning for me, somedays i just open a bottle of liquor, somedays its just me taking a scenic route back home, somedays its just having a cup of tea/coffee from the place that i am a frequent of, somedays i just talk to my friend and make plans for the day off that coincides with our plans, somedays i just watch come serial/movie that piques my interest, somedays it’s just taking pictures of things that bring peace to me..
Somedays it just me rotting in bed scrolling through a bunch of apps endlessly like the life that i live in, and that brings me no happiness at all, it’s something that i do till my eyes shut down on their own…
You know proper unwinding is only when you feel refreshed from the last day’s chaos, but that hasn’t happened in so long that it feels like a foreign concept, nothing that I could ever achieve…
To the life that is remaining which shall be spent chasing things that bring peace…
Cheers 🥂
An image that exists on a day that was so tiring that it almost took my life, as I was driving back home I saw these exact colors and hues, so I stopped and took a pic to remember this day and end it on a higher note…
I know this isn’t something to be said just like that, but this is something that I wrote in my notes app when I heard this news…
A relative in my family met with an accident as they were driving to a place away from their home and they met with an accident, the husband and their adopted child escaped with minor injuries, but, the wife she fell and hit her head directly on the pavement, there was massive b;eeding, and in shock everyone was…
Then began the trips to hospitals, they took her to the nearest one, they gave the initial attention and recommended her to another one and another one to another…
After finding a good doctor(extremely rare), he told us(un-officially) that we should take her to a hospital that’s nearest to their home, and they did, because losing someone away from home isn’t something that noone would ever ask for…
After keeping her in a hospital we got the news that she had a blood clot in her brain and some fragments of the bone of her skull punctured into the brain; overnight surgery was the go to for having any hopes of saving her and after that she was put on ventilator for the rest of her time…
After being given a timeline of maybe a week, maybe a month, maybe an year, just after 10 days we were told that there’s no more life in that body, all the chaos that rolled down after that, the fight with doctors and staff, removing the ventilator, her breathing her last as the plug was pulled, remaining was the empty bag of flesh and bones…
After bringing her lifeless body back home, and preparing all the things necessary for the rituals, all until the pyres were engulfed with flames and her remains reduced to ashes….
Thats how life has been, i haven’t been able to think straight, after witnessing a second one this month…
He||, literal He|| of a month…
But, the world goes on…
We wish for her journey ahead to be an easy and blessed one
In a disarray we all were, until we were given the news, now like these flowers once full of life, they lay down, to be a part of the cycle once again,just like we all shall one day….
A beautiful vine that I caught on the morning walk
There’s no love in the monotonous life that I live, I woke up early and scrolled some, go out for a walk, jot down some ideas, return home and get ready for work, leave in a hurried way and return around 9 PM sometimes 10… With zero will left to live, I had to get addicted to something…
But the fact that I was tired daily and used something to cope with stress of the life, It was a mess, a literal one, within a span of few years i was addicted…
I was drinking heavily, the cup was the only thing I used to talk to late night, and tbh it was soothing, I used to drink and have food and then go to my peaceful sleep….
But, that came with a price, within a few weeks the same quantity didn’t satiate me, it began with a single additional drink, and then it went to 4-5 heavy drinks each night, and with that came nicotine and heavy addiction to caffeine to kill the buzz from last night…
Within a span of few months, I couldn’t live without the thought of not having something to drink, or something to smoke…
So,
I began cold turkeying all of it, there were failures one too many, some were deliberate, others were accidental, like there’s a meetup of friends so we chose to buy a few bottles and then we poured and drank until there were no more….
So, one day, just trying to give up, and losing the battle, i saw, my mom staring at me, “How much more will you drink…?” not noticing that i just returned home and they used to lock their doors when i began drinking, they’d only come out after I was in and out (slipping) to tell me the food was getting cold…
So, just one day, returning home, not drinking, and having dinner with them, and watching their faces light up, like a child finding a lost toy, they began the setting the table and food…
I didn’t know they were having their food all alone in their rooms, and it hit me like a truck, so from that day onwards, I’ve given up drinking and smoking altogether….
Just to see these happy faces, my happy faces…
(THIS SOBER LIFE ISN’T FOR ALL, THERE ARE DAYS WHEN I JUST LOOK AT MY CABINET AND THINK ABOUT TAKING A SWIG, BUT, ITS MORE THAN TRUST AT THIS POINT OF TIME; ITS ABOUT THE FIGHT THAT BEGAN FROM WITHIN, TAKING THE FORM OF AN EXTERNAL SOURCE TO KEEP IT GOING…)
From the glass of water that i have in my hand;
A virtual cheer 🥂
Daily writing prompt
How have you adapted to the changes brought on by the Covid-19 pandemic?
there were things that happened that really took a lot from me and shaped me into who i am today even if i like them or not…
I have gotten around using masks much more than what i should have, tbh i cannot function without a mask these days maybe developing a sort of allergy from the dust that is around me… (maybe i had a dust allergy beforehand but it got aggravated by using an additional layer…. G0d knows)
It has forced me to question the origin of each source of food more than a normal person should… (like Oh is this sea food, was this handled well, was it prepared properly was it cleaned, was it farmed or open range, are there any visual defects that could be removed and be passed on as safe to consume, just because the owner wanted to maximize the profits by cutting corners, or plain old are they making us eat trash just to fill their pockets…?
( this might not be a literal change but a change in the way i could be ripped off by someone just trying to make his living)
What experiences in life helped you grow the most?
There are many things that have helped me, in a way to shape the being that I am today…
I’ve had my trust betrayed by those whom I considered mine, actually too close to me and when I caught them in the act, they brushed it off like there wasn’t something to begin with, even after all of the chaos, they came back to me and told me that what they said was in the heat of the moment and they didn’t mean it..
But I told them anger brought out what they really thought about me and my place in their life…
So slowly I drifted away from their lives…
Occasionally I see them from afar,
And when our eyes meet,
There’s a sense of consideration that I see in them,
But,
That phase has long gone so we cross our paths like we are strangers while still acknowledging our past,
Even if there’s no one, you’ll always have yourself, There’s always someone who will look at you and admire you, the type of person you are, the choices you make, even if they feel they are not beneficial at present, they shall be in the near future, I know that, but, the world needs to know that too…
I know you walk alone on paths, because you still remember, how hard it was to bring yourself up, when nothing was going right, when you lost the entire world, that Wednesday, early morning, when the entire world was dead asleep, you know you lost yourself, you lost something that mattered to you, and was there someone who had your back, was there someone who patted your back, was there someone who took you in their embrace…?
That’s why…
There isn’t going to be anyone, and therefore, there shall be a place for no-one…
(That’s really cruel to anyone who tries to come near you with the right intentions…)
Waakiye 