Waakiye

Tag: mental-health

  • How Writing Transformed My Self-Perception

    How Writing Transformed My Self-Perception

    Daily writing prompt
    What are you good at?
    View all responses

    Hey…

    I hope all of you are doing well…!

    I woke up late and I saw this prompt,
    and thought to myself,
    “Am I good at something…?”…
    And I stared at the rotating fan,
    for an hour thinking of inducing a thought…

    Am I a good daughter/son to my mother…?
    Am I a good aunt/uncle to the kids that surround me…?
    Am I a good sister/brother to those who are around me…?
    Am I a good friend to those who call me theirs…?
    Am I even a good person,
    or people around me just tolerate me…?
    Am I…..?

    The reality blemished when I realized that I’m ruthless,
    when it comes to myself ,
    I don’t give myself a chance,
    I keep myself in well bound time,
    meticulously planning each and every moment,
    prioritizing time,
    but making none for myself…

    I took up art as a kid and left it in the middle,
    I picked up table tennis, basketball, badminton and gave up all of them in the middle,
    I won’t say that I got good at them,
    but,
    just gave up before I could or I met an invisible boundary that made it impossible for me as a non-earning kid to overcome…

    Before I could even grab what was happening,
    I was pushed into work,
    because I wasn’t good in anything,
    where I tired myself day and night,
    so much so,
    that I wouldn’t have enough time to think about anything,
    my liking,
    my interests,
    my own personal opinions and choices,
    No time to think about things that could broaden my horizon,
    my thought process,
    so I spent a couple of years just looking at things from a perspective,
    that a lifeless soulless being,
    and kept my head down…
    UNTIL…

    Until I found this penmanship,
    and took it to myself to make it better,
    and a sole goal in my life to be good at something,
    something that I liked,
    loved,
    and wished to be a big part of my life,
    and I honed it,
    like my life depended on it,
    and kept on doing this,
    making little time here and there,
    scribbling in my notes app,
    or my trusted partner,
    pen and a notepad in which I wrote my raw thoughts and,
    thought on them,
    hours upon hours until,
    I felt satisfied that my thought process has evolved,
    but,
    that too didn’t feel enough…

    So,
    That’s what I exactly did,
    for a few seconds,
    turning into minutes,
    those turning into hours,
    hours into days,
    days into weeks,
    weeks into months,
    and months into years…

    Take a wild guess how long it has been now,
    that I’m writing this,
    and I shall correct you in the comments box….

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

    Go back

    Your message has been sent

    Choose one option

    A lone,
    all alone,
    in search of copper
    I struck gold…

    A vastness,
    unexplored,
    a bottomless pit
    in which I found myself…

    Impossible to climb out of.
    If it were someone else,
    it wouldn’t be possible,
    But-

    it’s me.
    And I say:
    “I’m-possible.”

    It’s possible,
    because it’s me..

    But,

    Never has this been me:
    A person who loved himself…

    Available for those around,
    round the clock,
    until I found…

    I found
    the thing I was meant for
    or
    something that saved me from it.

    “The Search That Found Me…”
  • The Duality of ‘Having It All’ Across Generations

    The Duality of ‘Having It All’ Across Generations

    Daily writing prompt
    What does “having it all” mean to you? Is it attainable?
    View all responses

    Hey…

    I hope all of you are doing well…

    This is something that one needs to ask themselves,
    no matter how or where they stand in life,
    Maybe they are not doing so well financially,
    Maybe they are not at the age where they can choose between family and their career,
    Maybe they need to explore themselves more before sharing them with someone else,
    OR,
    Maybe they feel like having a presence mean that their peace will be bothered,
    and they are not ready yet to be a part of something that world wants,
    pushes them to be…

    There’s an extreme duality in this question if you’d believe me ;

    You can ask this question,
    this exact same question to someone who comes from extreme poverty,
    and you will get two answers to this one,

    One,
    the older generation who has been through this and feels just wants their immediate needs met,
    they think if they can afford food this day,
    or two square meals a day,
    because that’s how they believe it is,
    if they can attain food for the day,
    they have earned their keep,
    they have had it all for the day…

    On the contrary,
    they younger generation,
    they won’t stop,
    they will use any means or methods,
    to achieve what they have planned,
    even if it means,
    getting home late,
    using any way to achieve what they want,
    no matter how legal or illegal…

    What is that mindset that can be satisfied by achieving one goal..?

    I have planned another goal after this one,
    and another one after that…
    that’s how growth happens,
    you just keep hitting a spot,
    once and keep at it again and again,
    until you become a master at it,
    the process that takes years,
    entire lifetime maybe,
    BUT,
    keeping at it matters…

    As for me,
    I can never have it all,
    having it all means death of wishes and wants for me,
    but that happens when you believe that you’ve got it all,

    If there’s an empty space that keeps pushing,
    forcing you for strive for better results,
    forever,
    that means you’ll never get tired to work hard,
    even if it takes a form of inspiration to be a better daughter/son,
    father/mother, brother/sister,
    or a friend too…

    Its only attainable,
    If you believe you’ve achieved the goal first,
    and that too 100% of it,
    which is already set to max difficulty pushing you above and beyond…

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

    As I looked from afar,
    a family,
    a family that I call mine,
    hosting the birthday party,
    a child that was welcomed this day,
    a few years back,
    a family,
    a family I call mine…

    As I sat in my car,
    waiting as the stresses of the world grabbed me by the throat,
    I had to leave them in my car,
    or,
    at the workplace,
    where I got it all from,
    but,
    this day,
    this day I was handed more,
    more than what I could handle,
    and almost forgot all about this,
    all about the birth of my own child…

    As I looked from afar…

    I wish I could’ve come home earlier,
    planned it with them,
    be a part of process that makes it all happen,
    But,
    something at makes it all happens,
    the finances that back it all,
    they wouldn’t have been arranged,
    if I were,
    if I came home earlier…

    As I looked from afar,
    a family,
    a family that I call mine…
  • Finding Time for Oneself: A Personal Story

    Finding Time for Oneself: A Personal Story

    Daily writing prompt
    Who would you like to talk to soon?
    View all responses

    Hey…

    I hope all of you are doing well…

    Have you ever looked at a topic and thought,
    Huh?
    There are many who have given up on talking to me,
    despite all of the efforts,
    made from my side to reach them out,
    knowing I haven’t made time for myself,
    in the past couple of years,
    Yes; Years,
    I’ve been running on autopilot for the past couple of years,
    trying to manage everything,
    friends,
    family,
    relations,
    and,
    Business too…

    But,
    never in all those years I’ve got a call,
    I’ve got a message,
    never got a reminder,
    never got nothing to prove that they worry about my being,
    (not my well-being🥲)
    SO,
    would I even ask those,
    from whom I’m a message away,
    to get into a conversation again,
    knowing all the efforts will be made from my side,
    and ultimately,
    it will be my fault to give up or end the conversation,
    because I didn’t carry it…

    So,
    My answer to this one would be,
    “MYSELF”…

    I would like to have a conversation,
    with myself,
    because I haven’t got the time,
    even after all of these years,
    I’ve made for myself tasks that I have to do on the regular,
    But,
    those are without any reward,
    or any benefit for myself (at present),
    but,
    this constant pressure to achieve,
    to do things without any fixed goal,
    or something that I can count on,
    And that too for G0d knows how many years,
    and for many more to come…

    I’d love to sit down with myself,
    and have a conversation with myself on things that bug me,
    worry me,
    and things that bring relief,
    and one day I will,
    one day….

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

    On a lone road,
    yet again,
    again,
    on the same path that goes towards a place
    I call home…

    But,
    what for,
    what is it that I do this all for?
    who do I do it all for?
    Is there something for me to gain,
    Is there something for me to learn,
    Is there something for me to become,
    become someone who will be there for everyone,
    take fall for everyone around,
    but,
    What about…..?

    What about the person who became a support system,
    one who is there to provide an ear,
    listen to all your problems,
    Does,
    do his problems even matter…?

    Or,
    he’s better off as support,
    bottling it all in,
    taking support of things that help him cope,
    the cup in this hand,
    a lit cigarette in other,
    as smoke rises,
    just like the problems,
    when he’s under…..

    THE “INFLUENCE”
  • Overcoming Social Media Addiction: Small Steps

    Overcoming Social Media Addiction: Small Steps

    Daily writing prompt
    What’s one small improvement you can make in your life?
    View all responses

    Hey…

    I hope all of you are doing really well…!

    There is a need for each and every one to improve themselves,
    it might be something that is well within your reach or maybe requires some effort,
    maybe a lot of it,
    if you’re starting from zero,
    but that’s how the efforts are made,
    and they give you the fruits of all the time you put in…

    I really wish to be less addicted to things,
    I am very much addicted to social media apps,
    Instagram and such,
    and they have been cutting into my time;

    The time,
    I have to provide towards another aspects of life,
    My family,
    My life
    Friends and other personal aspects of my life,
    there has been nothing but efforts from my side,
    but,
    I cannot afford to give it up too,
    because a lot of work happens there also that’s how we are connected to each other,
    because of many such reasons,
    I cannot give up social media…

    This too being a part of social media,
    but,
    the place that you call home,
    consider home,
    one cannot defame it,
    can they…?

    There are others like,
    lower screen time,
    not using it at all at or before bed time or during eating,
    and many other things like making a reminder of tasks that you have to accomplish during the day,
    making your bed,
    taking the morning walk or the workout;

    and one must do things to move ahead and be a better version of self,
    that’s how we all move ahead…

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

    With a phone in this hand,
    I watch as things,
    some important,
    other non-important ones pile up:

    On setting reminders and snoozing them from hours on time,
    and after that,
    contemplating the life choices that led to this point,
    I look at the screen,
    a blank one,
    a reminder pops us,
    yet again;

    Take a break,
    scroll the app that you like,
    A sly laughter leaves my face as,
    I go in the balcony and in my hand a light,
    A spark is heard,
    and smoke rises,
    easing my mind…

  • Life Lessons from Personal Quotes

    Life Lessons from Personal Quotes

    Daily writing prompt
    Do you have a quote you live your life by or think of often?
    View all responses

    Hey

    I hope you all are doing well…!

    There are a few sentences that i live by,
    they aren’t necessarily quotes,
    but they’re self-drawn rules that I live by,
    Well,
    I think each and every one of us should have some,
    rules or something that helps you set,
    what is right or wrong,
    in a situation…

    Quotes are those who are written by a writer and such,
    and when you are one in the making,
    what’s better than looking at something that you wrote,
    to keep yourself in check,
    during times that you thought would be the end of you…

    The said quote(s)…

    1)

    THE FALL TAUGHT ME TO GET UP AND MOVE FORWARD,

    IT DIDN’T TELL ME TO STOP AND SIT DOWN,

    IT TOLD ME THE REASON FOR THE FALL,

    AND I DIDN’T STOP LEARNING,

    NOR I’M STOPPING,

    DIDN’T STOP YESTERDAY,

    WILL NOT STOP TODAY,

    WONT STOP TOMORROW,

    BECAUSE,

    I DIDN’T STOP LEARNING…

    ★Didn’t stop learning★

    2)

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    CAN’T CRASH OUT

    ✅CAN THUG MY WAY OUT OF THIS ONE, SO

    I WON’T CRASH OUT

    These two are the ones I often check out,
    there are more but those are some other ideas,
    prompting some other feelings…

    For the time being,
    you can read them,
    save them,
    make them your quotes too…

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

    This is exactly how it feels when some prompt like this comes in…
    (Ai generated image…)

  • How I Conquered My Nerves at a Theatrical Play

    What makes you nervous?

    Even though I’m quite a reserved person,
    there are some things that give birth to nervousness within me….

    Being the person that I am,
    I’m not that open to new experiences and if I want to experience new ones,
    it feels like my mind already has planned all of the outcomes even before I am to undergo the “Said” experience…

    For example;

    I once went to a theatrical play and I was running late,
    I had a fixed seat which I booked a few weeks in advance.

    On reaching there a little late,
    the host had already opened with the introductions.

    …….

    As I entered and looked for my seat and saw someone else sitting in mine,
    on telling them this was my seat,

    He told me he had a seat in the middle somewhere which he booked outside the hall,
    can I take that one..?

    On telling him that I couldn’t
    because I booked this seat weeks prior and I will sit here;

    Nervousness creeped in
    as he didn’t get up even after asking politely,
    and after that in a stern voice,
    after a few moments the staff came in as he stated to raise his voice against me.

    Knowing this was a public place,
    and they reserved the right for our admission,
    as I showed them the ticket and he was politely told to go to his seat,
    which he refused.

    On pausing the play for a moment all the lights were lit,
    and the said person was told to move to his seat or to be escorted out of the venue by security.

    The smug look on his face now wiped clean as he murmured something in his mouth and squeezed himself to his seat in the middle..

    That thing made me quite nervous.

    But thankfully I booked in advance and the staff were really helpful…!

    Overall,
    A good day that was.

    Apart from me losing my sh|t there.

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye

    The first pic I took as I reached the destination after transversing through roads that were small and had a great abyss on the other side; the hazy memories of those times stay just like these pictures in my mind!!!

  • A Positive change

    Daily writing prompt
    Describe one positive change you have made in your life.
    View all responses
    A beautiful vine that I caught on the morning walk

    There’s no love in the monotonous life that I live,
    I woke up early and scrolled some,
    go out for a walk,
    jot down some ideas,
    return home and get ready for work,
    leave in a hurried way and return around 9 PM sometimes 10…
    With zero will left to live,
    I had to get addicted to something…


    But the fact that I was tired daily and used something to cope with stress of the life,
    It was a mess,
    a literal one,
    within a span of few years i was addicted…

    I was drinking heavily,
    the cup was the only thing I used to talk to late night,
    and tbh it was soothing,
    I used to drink and have food and then go to my peaceful sleep….

    But,
    that came with a price,
    within a few weeks the same quantity didn’t satiate me,
    it began with a single additional drink,
    and then it went to 4-5 heavy drinks each night,
    and with that came nicotine and heavy addiction to caffeine to kill the buzz from last night…

    Within a span of few months,
    I couldn’t live without the thought of not having something to drink,
    or something to smoke…

    So,

    I began cold turkeying all of it,
    there were failures one too many,
    some were deliberate,
    others were accidental,
    like there’s a meetup of friends so we chose to buy a few bottles and then we poured and drank until there were no more….

    So,
    one day,
    just trying to give up,
    and losing the battle,
    i saw,
    my mom staring at me,
    “How much more will you drink…?”
    not noticing that i just returned home and they used to lock their doors when i began drinking,
    they’d only come out after I was in and out (slipping) to tell me the food was getting cold…

    So,
    just one day,
    returning home,
    not drinking,
    and having dinner with them,
    and watching their faces light up,
    like a child finding a lost toy,
    they began the setting the table and food…

    I didn’t know they were having their food all alone in their rooms,
    and it hit me like a truck,
    so from that day onwards,
    I’ve given up drinking and smoking altogether….

    Just to see these happy faces,
    my happy faces…

    (THIS SOBER LIFE ISN’T FOR ALL,
    THERE ARE DAYS WHEN I JUST LOOK AT MY CABINET AND THINK ABOUT TAKING A SWIG,
    BUT,
    ITS MORE THAN TRUST AT THIS POINT OF TIME;
    ITS ABOUT THE FIGHT THAT BEGAN FROM WITHIN,
    TAKING THE FORM OF AN EXTERNAL SOURCE TO KEEP IT GOING…)

    From the glass of water that i have in my hand;

    A virtual cheer 🥂