Waakiye

Tag: better

  • Learning to Breathe Again— This Morning, After the Rain…!

    Learning to Breathe Again— This Morning, After the Rain…!

    What strategies do you use to cope with negative feelings?

    Hey…!

    I hope all of you are doing well…!

    I came here early as it’s 6 in the morning and Delhi is receiving rain…?

    In the middle of march…?

    I got up and pushed our clothes stand indoors, which was chilling in the balcony;

    And Mithu , our pet indie dog started barking and howling at the cloth stand that we have…!

    It’s now 7 am and it’s still showering;

    —

    I don’t know what is going on anymore…!

    After scrolling some reels I’m on my terrace as soon as the rain went away…!

    It’s now 8:18…

    And the weather is soo beautiful,

    A blue grey sky and our Indian flag in my line of sight…!

    The cool breeze that is blowing occasionally makes it even more mesmerising…!

    I was almost positive that I wouldn’t be able to go on my morning walk because of the occasional shower but this rain has cleared a lot of dust and brings out the vibrant colors around me;

    Which makes me happy…!

    Flowers of kadi patta plant…!

    Walking right into our prompt

    Things I do to cope with negative feelings…!!!

    Well,

    One of the things that I do daily to cope with these feelings are go on a walk…!

    Well because it all used to start in the morning for me,

    So I planned to change it by going on walks and distracting myself from it all,

    The first thing in the morning…!

    Because I usually pen down things that come on my mind early in the morning and it’s very easy for me to go and doom scroll,

    Because it’s a shift from this app to that…!

    So to avoid it all and spoil my entire day, I do all of the thinking and writing on my morning walk…!

    Listening to music is something that is right up my alley—

    When I feel like the world is overwhelming for me I just get away from it all by putting on my headphones on and listen to some soft tunes or focus on my breathing while having some frequency playing which helps me focus and shift away from negative feelings…!

    Sit and observe

    It might feel unlike me,

    But, sometimes when nothing works I just sit still or visit a park or a nursery,

    And think about things that are beautiful and tell myself there’s so much to live for;

    Yes I tell myself there is so much to live for because sometimes thoughts coincide with each other as they aren’t far from each other…!

    Meeting with friends and talking to them

    Something that is right up my avenue is talking to my friends and hanging out with with them;

    Often they say something that is funny and makes me forget about life and all of its problems,

    The very root of my problems seem to fade when I am with them…!

    And when that happens It seems I’m the happiest in this whole world…!

    Read/Listen something interesting

    This is something that happens rarely as I don’t have much time on its own,

    But I do have time to listen to podcasts and audio versions of the book which I really want to read but don’t have the time for;

    And it brings me real joy when I finish an audiobook or when I get some inspiration to think from a perspective different from mine…!

    Well there are things that I used to do but those take us down a bad path,

    Like drinking to cope with all of the pain and negative thoughts and ideas…!

    And harming yourself to feel something other than sadness;

    Like pain…!

    But,

    I’m really glad that I had the power to pull myself out of that situation thanks to people around me and their continuous support,

    To the point it seemed like this life wasn’t worth living,

    And I’m glad I made it out of all those time…!

    Life is worth living,

    Surviving all of the problems that come with it;

    So keep your head up,

    Look at things around you,

    Sniff some flowers if you have to…

    Whatever helps you to live and pull yourself away from the negative thoughts it works(not if it harms your life in other ways…)

    Keep on living it will get better…!

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

  • The Quiet Ways We Disappear Each Day…

    The Quiet Ways We Disappear Each Day…

    What activities do you lose yourself in?

    Hey…

    I hope all of you are doing well…!

    Well this day started a bit early as I was up at 7 and writing down a dream that I had about someone passing away and the things that happen as soon as we discover it and we call those who are around us and try to begin things according to our traditions…!

    It took me 40 minutes to recollect all of the information and write;

    And after penning it all down I got up to go for my morning walk but then my mom came into my room and I told her all the dream and people involved in it…!

    And she told me something like that happening in real life and how she saw living proofs of it may time and then the conversation drifted off to a different topic—

    Here I am,

    Writing this all at 8:21 in the morning and the sunlight is blessing us all…!

    Well it’s a common occurrence for me now as I have been penning all of my dream(which I remember…)

    As soon as I wake up I grab my phone,

    And not scroll anything,

    I just open my notes or journal app and pen what I remember in a fast and quick manner and I skip all of the mistakes—

    Which I correct later when I am proofreading or I have to upload it somewhere…!

    —

    I will try my level best to give you a proof this evening about a dream that I had somewhere along this life…!

    Coming back to the prompt…

    Activities I lose myself in…

    I know these times are very difficult;

    Once we keep in our perspective attention span of people and how it has deteriorated compared to previous years—

    —

    When we look at people walking by and they are looking into those screens;

    We get into a painful realisation,

    That the childhood that we spent once playing,

    Getting hurt,

    Crying,

    Learning to get up yet again and doing it all over—-

    Those times are over and everything happens over calls or video calls now;

    Or—

    You didn’t remember carrying your power bank and the battery in your phone died that’s why you are looking at things around you now…! 😂

    But;

    A painful realisation comes in,

    The devices have controlled us more than we imagine;

    They came in these big boxes, those bulky monitors and that cpu unit we once had—

    But these days the phones and laptops have turned each and every thing into a something that you can carry everywhere and do everything on the go…!

    Well,

    For me it’s the same and a bit different simultaneously;

    You know you read all of the above 12 maybe 13 lines because I love to lose myself within these words…!

    As I begin to think and write about something by dwelling into a world that exists within mind;

    And simultaneously trying to explore the readers mind and coming up with some things that might be common with both of ours….!

    Another one would be work,

    Because I’ve developed love for it over the years,

    And the day feels unfulfilling until a major chunk of work isn’t completed;

    Well not all days are the same and some days I return home with this unaccomplished feeling that’s hard to shake off—

    And when that happens,

    There’s nothing more worse than that;

    Until I go next day and come back home with a sense of accomplishment…!

    Other than those two I love to listen to music and lose myself within that moment…

    And love would be an understatement because if it were possible I’d keep an headphone in my ears all the time and not worry about my hearing at all…!

    Well this one couldn’t have come at a bad time because I do have my earphones in…!

    Well,

    It takes me to a world that exists beyond this one as I listen to a wide range going from classical to new school;

    Folk to rap,

    From Fairuz to Nusrat Fateh Ali khan to Sidhu Moosewala(LLSMW 🕊️)…

    It takes me to a world beyond this one and makes me exposes me to their pov and their mindset…!

    And if you are still here reading this after-all,

    I cannot tell you how we lose ourselves in the arms of our loved ones…

    There is nothing that is more soothing than being in the arms of someone who loves you for who you are and time flies away so—

    Oh so fast…!

    And how the time passed so soon as I’m writing this one—-

    It’s now 9:06 and I have to go…😅😂

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

    (Final editing time 9:16)

  • A deeper look into LPG shortage in India and rewatching old classics…

    A deeper look into LPG shortage in India and rewatching old classics…

    What movies or TV series have you watched more than 5 times?

    Hey 👋

    I hope all of you are doing well…!

    A cool breezy morning it is and it’s 7:33 in the morning here;

    And I’m back on my routine of morning walk as I’m writing this one…!

    Something I’d like to bring to your attention that’s happening here in Delhi…!

    We the residents of Delhi are going through an LPG(liquified petroleum gas) shortage;

    There are lines near the agencies,

    Increased rates of the LPG cylinders,

    On top of that the rates have been increased by a factor of 60 rupees in the matter of a month;

    And the duration of rebooking period has increased from 21 days to 25 days now…!

    I know it might feel like it doesn’t affect you but it does affect people around you and as an informed citizen you should be aware of what is going on around the world,

    And what are its consequences that we all are facing…!

    We all were already stretching it to 21 days and now the new rule tells us to extend it by 4 more days again…?

    A task that seems impossible without having an induction plate or chipping in money to buy one in black…!

    You know what,

    If we had pipeline gas at our residence I would be unaware of this fact;

    But,

    I don’t so you have an insight into this…!

    The main reason for increasing this time limit and the shortage is to trap the banquets and restaurants owners who illegally buy domestic LPG cylinder cans that are cheaper than the regulated commercial ones by a factor of 1000 rupees…!

    This crackdown is on agencies and their illegal tie ups with places of business and the illegal way they were obtaining these cylinders on fake name and address proofs;

    Diverting an essential commodity away from its specific use i.e. us common people…!

    1700 worded LPG rant later we are here 😅😂

    Coming back to the prompt..

    Movie or TV series I have watched more than five times…!

    It would come to you as a shock but I don’t watch much of TV or movies;

    But,

    I’m into trying new things—

    I do watch videos YouTube a whole lot like an old uncle in your family…!

    😂🫩

    As I had mentioned in the prompt a few days before,

    I am watching The nanny.

    A 1993 tv series which is so hilarious as I accidentally came across it while doomscrolling reels…!

    But there isn’t anything that I watched five times;

    Not even a movie…!

    Because I do remember bits and pieces of it enough to remember it from my memory…!

    And it just stops being funny or worthy of spending my time on…!

    That’s how it is for me,

    And it can be very different for you I know…!

    There is some anime that I like to watch when I am free and secluded from the world,

    And when a new season comes in I do watch the old one to keep the flow going;

    Because, a new season can either be months or years apart and if that happens,

    Things slip from the cracks;

    So I rewatch the season quickly to jog my memory and keep up with the things that spill from the previous season to the next one…!

    Well I hope you do find something new each time you watch,

    And I hope you watch it from a different perspective each time making it a new experience for you…!

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

  • Being Superstitious and Binge watching TV series…!

    Being Superstitious and Binge watching TV series…!

    Are you superstitious?

    Hey…

    I hope all of you are doing well…!

    Slept well past my normal hours today for the first time in a while…!

    I remember going to sleep at 2:30 in the morning just because I wanted to watch a few more episodes of the TV series The Nanny from the year 1993…!

    And after watching a few episodes half asleep I think I will be watching them again to remember what I watched in the last hour…!

    With binge watching comes some munching so I had a bag of puffcorns that I went through almost until it was two in the morning…!

    Waking up at 8:30 and with a massive head pain and pain in my right leg;

    I decided not to go on my morning walk,

    But instead I will go on a night walk later after returning home from work….!

    Coming back to the prompt

    Our superstitious nature…!

    Are you even human if you don’t have a tad bit of superstition in things around you…?

    Well,

    A bit superstition makes us be aware of things that happen around us;

    Imagine travelling on an empty road that doesn’t seem empty to you;

    That’s your superstition talking to you and telling you to avoid walking on the road;

    The same also kicks in when a black cat passes the path that you wanted to take,

    And you change your path thinking it brings you bad luck…!

    But let me tell you something,

    That black cat is probably scared of something or running to get some food…!

    Another one would be sneezing before going someplace…!

    Like as soon as someone is leaving from home or leaving to do something important,

    And someone sneezes;

    They tell them to wait a few minutes and leave home a bit later—

    That is because if there is some mishap that was supposed to happen sometime in the future, it can be avoided as that wait kicked a change in the timeline…!

    I don’t know much about that…!

    Well,

    A bit of this superstition makes us who we are;

    We do things in advance or delay them as much as possible as possible,

    Sometime we take a detour,

    Sometime we avoid going to a place altogether that day and decide it can be delayed another day;

    And when that happens—

    It brings out our superstitious self and let it take over us…!

    Well,

    Maybe for good,

    Our good luck and wellbeing of those around us….

    Don’t we…?

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

  • The Power of Moving Unseen…

    The Power of Moving Unseen…

    Which animal would you compare yourself to and why?

    Hey..

    I hope all of you are doing well…!

    Another one of the days I woke up with a weird/ sad dream early in the morning and I spent half an hour penning it all down,

    As I recollected it from my memory halfway through my morning routine like brushing and freshening myself up…!

    If it would be possible for me I’d upload it as an evening post today itself…!

    And if i didn’t just think it needed more refining and it will be made as a post some other day…!

    It’s 7:23 in the morning as I’m writing this…!

    There’s something I wanted to ask this world…!

    —

    Do people still read books…?

    Or,

    Something like this,

    A WordPress blog from a random person…!?

    Because I have many people in my vicinity who would rather watch some shorts or consume media in the form of reels or something like that because the attention span has hit an all-time low…!

    To the point that I haven’t seen children reading a book,

    The plain textbooks that are the mandate for getting the basic education—

    It feels like even those are a chore to them;

    This genuinely makes me feel worried a whole lot about our coming generations;

    And;

    How we adults are actively taking down the world with us…!

    Would it ever be sustainable for those who come through us or will come through us in the near future…!

    (Gibran reference there…)

    Well,

    It’s this fear that will spark some change within me to make an effort towards improving their lives,

    No matter how insignificant it may feel on a broader perspective;

    But if a single child develops this love for reading;

    My task would be accomplished…!

    Coming back to the prompt…!

    Animal I compare myself to and the reason thereof…!

    Well,

    I am stuck between two animals that I would compare myself with—

    It would be

    An owl 🦉

    And

    A tortoise 🐢

    A common feature that they both share is that they are considered wise;

    The owl because of the abilities which they possess,

    Working swiftly to catch their prey,

    And in the middle of the night when the entire world is asleep…!

    Tortoise because of their sheer dedication to achieve what they want and with those trunk like feet they move each step towards their goal…!

    Well both of them possess wisdom in their fields and do what they have in their minds with excellence…!

    There are drawbacks too;

    Owl is practically blind during the day and it stays hidden until the sun sets when this normal world gets to rest;

    And the tortoise reaching from point A to point B takes so much time that in that duration maybe several of hours pass…!

    Even though they have their significant drawbacks;

    Those are overshadowed when it comes to their abilities…!

    And that is what I want you all to think;

    Despite being practically blind they live their lives, have their offsprings and raise their young ones…!

    Same goes for the tortoise,

    They achieve their goals no matter what by being consistent with the efforts that they make…!

    Teaching us two valuable lessons;

    Even though the world is coded to be active when the entire world is;

    It doesn’t mean that you are any less than those who are around you..!

    Maybe you possess some skills that activate when you are away from everyone;

    Or

    You can work significantly more than those who are around you and keep your dedication going on for longer than anyone around you…!

    This world is a blank slate and everyone has some skills that work that they uncover as they grow and explore themselves…!

    Until the growth and exploration doesn’t stop nothing can stop you ever…!

    So—

    Keep on growing and exploring..!

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

  • Offerings to Time on A Steel Plate…!

    Offerings to Time on A Steel Plate…!

    Write a letter to your 100-year-old self.

    Hey…

    I hope all of you are doing well…!

    Running a bit behind my schedule as it’s almost 8;

    Technically 7:59 as I am writing this…

    I had to wake up early as there is a puja 🙏🏻 (A prayer)

    That we do each year on the Tuesday that comes after Holi festival;

    Preferably the next week of Holi;

    But I’ll confirm this and come back to update it after making this post after asking the adults that are still in our home…!

    (Update here-> )

    Well the context is that we pray to a goddess named,

    Sheetala (शीतला माता)

    An incarnation of goddess Durga,

    Who protects us,

    Well technically all of her worshippers from infectious diseases like pox and its forms…

    For which every year we make food before the midnight strikes and eat that food throughout the day making it a day old and the same is offered to goddess Sheetala…!

    We wake up before sunrise and in a plate we keep what we made,

    The plate after we did the prayer and asked for all of our well being…!

    The same are mentioned in the image 👇

    Puri filled with potato(A veggie version of your standard empanada…)

    Gulgulay( literally donut holes but without a consistent shape as they are hand dropped into hot oil…)

    Sweet roti( A standard Indian flatbread that is sweet…)

    And wrapped in the newspaper is turmeric and chana daal( split Bengal gram…)

    And Bengal gram you see in the plate were used as an offering to the goddess; a handful of which were left overnight to soak in water…!

    And a crisp 20 rupees note that you see which we will put in the temple donation box…!

    The brown coloured doughnut holes in the right corner which are on top of the veggie empanada and on the left is the flatbread and in the newspaper are the turmeric and split Bengal gram…!

    Walking right into our prompt

    A letter to my 100 year old self…!

    Remember all of these traditions that we carry;

    And have been carrying for generations that have moreover been morphed according to accessibility…!

    These traditions make us who we are,

    Without them we are just nameless,

    Clueless being whose days are just stringed together without any change,

    You work,

    Come home to sleep and then repeat…!

    Make an effort to talk to your friends,

    Try to do something with them every once in a while and keep them in your good books and be in good books with them…!

    I hope we found a life partner that tolerates us and the deep thinking and over analysis that we do…!

    I’ll be spending more time noting down things that I like and both of us love to do—

    I know that’s what we both want,

    Also I know there would have been times when it would be great to keep our phones in our pocket after noting the bullets that we write and continue them later…!

    Because if you’re not present with those who are around you,

    You didn’t live your life…!

    I know we still have a habit of taking morning walks maybe on the rooftop of our house or maybe with a pet that we have,

    Because I know we have a pet at home…!

    I hope we do occasionally go on night outs on the weekends and drink tea stopping at random thela(a tea stand);

    And we have conversation about life and it’s happening with people that we love and travel with…!

    Something very important,

    I hope our kids and their lives are taken care of and not left hanging in the middle just like ours—

    And I hope—

    I sincerely hope you remember the infinite sacrifices that our parents went through and you do remember dad’s laughter and our mom’s smile including both the sad and happy moments that we spent both in our old and new home…!

    And,

    If you’re alive at the time of reading this one,

    (Which I really hope you are…)

    Look around you and tell me if the people those who surround you—

    Are they really happy for you to be there or they’re there just to mooch off of you…?

    Also,

    I hope we are still writing,

    It might not be much because with age comes a lot of forgetfulness,

    and some of our posts might sound repeated to the readers …!

    But continuing something for almost three fourth of our lifetime would classify as some sort of special event…!

    Well,

    I hope the entire world is cheering for us,

    As we make another post—

    And even if they aren’t;

    I know each one of them is special to us;

    Both of us…!

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

  • The Empty Space Between Our First and Last Names…

    The Empty Space Between Our First and Last Names…

    What is your middle name? Does it carry any special meaning/significance?

    Hey…

    I hope all of you are doing well…!

    Well yesterday ended on a weird note—

    Last night as I wrote some sketches on things that I wanted to describe;

    One was “what epitome of evil looks like”;

    Another one was how on a mother’s passing she meets her newborn that wasn’t able to survive…!

    .

    The latter one brought me to tears because it was all too emotional for me to feel and write;

    To be in someone’s shoes that I wasn’t made for and trying to give you all a witness into the thought…!

    The other one sent chills down my spine as I wrote that in a completely empty room and I felt like I wasn’t alone anymore…!

    Well they will be polished and uploaded some time in the near future here;

    But,

    For the time being there is a prompt that is unanswered by me which needs my attention—

    Middle name and it’s significance

    Well I’d call them blessed those who carry their legacy with them, which was granted to them by their forefathers;

    Oftentimes it can be something that a person considers to be an issue because it extends their name and there are other beurocratic problems that comes with it…!

    Well it hasn’t been my problem because I don’t have one;

    But my father had one;

    An it was “Kumar”

    The problematic aspect

    There were some problems with our 10th class marksheet where my sister had his first and last name but didn’t have the middle name which became an issue as we went to make passports because they rely on the marksheet and the details didn’t match which becomes an issue;

    A big one as no one was willing to budge…

    So we had to change it on Aadhar card which matches the marksheet which in turn now matches the passport that she holds…!

    Whew 😥…

    The process took a couple of months,

    Not taking money and time spent on it into the account…!

    The legacy;

    The name was chosen by my grandfather for his son which made him special from their other kids;

    Maybe there was some special attention that he was given;

    Or they expected him to be the one who will carry their name ahead…!

    Oh the hopes and dream that we have from those who come from us…!

    And a want that we have deep down in our hearts that they carry out our dreams too…!

    The middle name kumar doesn’t have any set uniqueness because it’s quite common in northern India;

    It’s also used to mention someone who is unmarried or underage;

    The female counterpart of which would be Kumari…

    Well that’s it for the day…!

    It’s a Sunday today and spend it wisely,

    Complete all of your chores early on so you can spend your evening as you wish…!

    Go sit in the sun for a while if you can and eat some tangerines if possible…!

    Don’t forget to hydrate…!💧💧

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

  • Two phases in my life that were hard to let go…

    Two phases in my life that were hard to let go…

    Describe a phase in life that was difficult to say goodbye to.

    Hey…

    I hope all of you are doing well…!

    It feels after a long time a prompt has come that I haven’t answered, and I’m all in for making this one a good read also to explore an avenue in my life that I suppressed…!

    A view into my life first, I’ve been looking for banquets each day after work and I’ve decided on two who are near the gurudwara which makes the travel easier and other programmes seamlessly connect with each other…!

    Well both of them are far from our home because we don’t have a banquet near our home…!

    So a lot of time has went into considering a good place and getting more out of our money…!

    Other than that,

    Work is going well,

    Because we are working each day and exploring new avenues and way to achieve the goals that we desire…!

    Coming back to the prompt

    A phase which was difficult to say goodbye to

    It isn’t easier to let go of things that made an impact in our lives isn’t it…?

    But,

    There are certain things that make them all worth your while and leave an everlasting impression on you…!

    Well losing someone who’s close to our hearts would be the first one…!

    A female dog birthed two kids and passed away right infront of our house;

    We took in her kids and within a span of few weeks both of them passed away as they were very little and weren’t able to get their mothers feed which was very important for their growth and their first few weeks here on earth…!

    We tried to get another female dog that also birthed a litter of puppies a few kilometres away but she rejected them and tried to bite them when we let them within her litter…

    On the offset that she might run away from her kids we brought them to our home and tried our best to save them—

    But fate had something else planned…!

    (Khair…)

    Another one would be parting away from someone who we thought were the love of our life…!

    Imagine you building your life around someone and they give up on you because their family planned something else or they found a more viable partner…?

    Something that breaks you from the very core and a mere sense of trust that you had breaks and shatters, making you lose yourself…!

    Well I hope it doesn’t happen with anyone else ever again…!

    I think,

    The things that happen around us shape us in a way that we were meant to have a grab of—

    I don’t mean passing away of a loved one is something that is good or builds character;

    But,

    It gives you a chance to see into the life by letting you see who is a real one and who was in just to leech off of you…!

    Who stands with you when time isn’t working with you…!

    And who all move away from you or face away when you get the short end of the stick…!

    Let’s not forget that all of us have to taste the sweet embrace of death once in our life and we won’t be here to witness what it feels like…!

    Keep those who are near to you near and tell them you love them…!

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

  • Adjusting until a version of myself erodes…!

    Adjusting until a version of myself erodes…!

    A submissive mother,
    A intractable father.

    Often were the fights,
    More often they were physical…

    A bruise here,
    A cut there,
    The eyes puffy from crying,
    from under them peeked a reddish-blue bruise,
    haphazardly done, uneven cover-up it seemed…

    But,

    A question remained on my mind…!?

    How did they end up sharing the same bed each night…?

    Writer’s note

    Later, he would end up having his way and being physical with her—
    After that him profusely crying,
    clinging to her bare body,
    like a newborn,
    rubbing his face in her chest,
    And,
    she held him in close,
    until he felt asleep…

    3rd person’s pov

    This became a regular happening,
    he would come home angry—
    angry on someone,
    or something that didn’t went his way
    and,
    in a fit of rage,
    A hand would be raised,
    A loud smack would resonate within these walls-
    Sobbing would be heard later,
    along with them tears would start to flow,
    in a single sweep he would hit her once again,
    telling her to shut up,
    and bring him food…

    Taking the support of the wall,
    or a drawer she would slowly get up,
    but,
    before she could stand on her feet,
    he would get up once again,
    grab her by her shoulder,
    pressing his thumb firm into her joint,
    turning her low-pitched sobs,
    into silent screams with tears,
    due to the extreme amount of pain,
    after that he would throw her,
    into the direction of the kitchen,
    where she would go and heat food for him…

    If it was a little cold or too hot,
    he would throw the chair back,
    yelling at her yet again,
    and those tears would start to roll again,
    sometimes he would throw the plate in her direction,
    not worrying if it were to hit her,
    her arm,
    her face,
    her eyes,
    no matter where it went;

    Often the neighbors heard her—
    her cries of help;

    Initially people would wake up,

    Bang our door late at night, Come to her rescue,

    But now,

    it was such a common happening,
    that they wouldn’t even bother to get up,
    much rather go out and look outside…!

    Every other day screams would be heard,
    Her sobbing and His screaming—

    Terror roamed the house,
    and none was there to stop it,
    stop any of it;

    As soon as he was done eating,
    he would go into the bathroom,
    clean himself up,
    and sit on his side of the bed—


    Scrolling his phone until a faint shadow of her entered the room for a brief moment and then went into the bathroom;

    He would curiously watch her from the side of his eye going into the bathroom,
    then she’d come out with a bucket of clothes,
    which she would take to the terrace to hang them on the ropes that were connected to poles on either side of the rooftop…

    Returning to their room,
    she knew,
    what she would have to do,
    to ease the pain that he had,
    even if she wasn’t to blame at all,
    not even a little bit…;

    On coming down and locking the main entry door,
    then their bedroom door;


    It was a big room,
    but not a spacious one,
    on one wall was a TV,
    in front of it,
    was the bed,

    There was a cabinet that has their essentials, Another cabinet sat in that spacious room that made it even more cramped,

    In it were bottles filled to the brim with color transparent and gold like…!
    Surrounded it was by walls colored in blue,
    A pale blue color,
    flakes of which were peeling off and felling on the floor;


    An effort she made each day to clean them,
    but another scream he roared,
    not to use the broom at night,
    as he snatched it from her hand and told her to get ready soon…

    In a fit of paralyzing fear,
    she hurriedly picked it up,
    and kept it in the corner of the room,
    away from his sight as he found it very unappealing—

    Before coming to bed,
    she hit the light switch off,
    and sat on her side of the bed—

    Before laying down,
    her hand reached up the drawer,
    and from it came a box,
    which had various creams and ointments—

    She stared at the box for a moment,
    because it had a mirror glued on it,
    seeing her bruised up face—
    Remembering a smile that was once her identity,
    Now, none of it was left,
    not even an essence of it,
    as she opened the box—

    Taking out Vaseline for her hands,
    Boroline for her cracked heels,
    and some other over the counter medicine for the bruises,
    which she had an abundance of,
    after a good 15 minute she was ready to lay down,
    but,
    her problems were far from over…

    As soon as she laid down,
    his tantrums started,
    rolling on his side of the bed,
    grunting,
    crushing his teeth,
    all sorts of irritable behaviors,
    But,
    she knew what was coming,
    after 10-15 minutes,
    when all went silent,
    you could hear him panting,
    and after that,
    those short breaths,
    turned into little sobs,
    knowing this was a usual behavior,
    his usual behavior,
    she didn’t instigate him for a couple of minutes…

    After 15-20 minutes passed,
    she held out her hand,
    and placed it on his shoulder,
    knowing,
    he won’t subside until it happens,
    and,
    because she doesn’t want to get hit yet again,
    she starts something she doesn’t like even a single bit of…

    As she pulls herself towards him,
    grabbing his back,
    in an effort to comfort him,
    after being a literal punching bag to him—

    He wanted to be comforted,
    He wanted closure—


    “Look at the audacity,
    look at the situation life put me in…!” She though in her mind…

    First I have to beg for mercy,
    and then please the same person;


    He treats me like a piece of meat,
    uses and then throws me away,
    only to torture me again,
    the next day,


    “Why,
    Why do i have to submit to him…?!    ”

    I thought…

    Maybe, being from a poor background is the cause—


    I don’t have people—
    my people backing me

    I was told to adjust,
    and adjust some more,
    until his comfort was met,
    and mine was ruined till there was none left of it…!

    (The rest will be continued tomorrow…)

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍

  • Doing away with dual meaning and walking away from people…!

    Doing away with dual meaning and walking away from people…!

    If you could permanently ban a word from general usage, which one would it be? Why?

    Hey…

    I hope all of you are doing well…!

    Another already answered prompt forcing me to cut short my answer and get into one of my saved posts or getting into my notes app to find something worthy of your time…!

    Well an answer for the prompt would be something like this…!

    I wouldn’t necessarily ban a word because I’m not in a position to do that,

    But,

    what I’d like to happen is to do away with the dual meaning of words that happen after another generation picks it up…!

    For example the word

    Cooked,

    Meant that the “food was ready” but these days it means something else entirely…!

    These days in slang it means “to be in big trouble or exhausted”

    This duality has ruined a lot of words like

    Slay

    Glaze

    Bet

    Tea

    The list goes on and on…!

    I would do away with this duality because it’s hard for me to search for the meaning behind the slangs all the time…!

    One of my posts underneath ⏬

    You only see what you want!

    Don’t you…?

    No…

    Sometimes,

    They only show what they want to be seen as,
    and they’re so good at it,
    you come to know this later…!

    They aren’t even a speck of what they act,
    like their behaviour and their actions can be the polar opposite of what they are with someone else…

    Glad I came and distanced myself,
    or rather,
    I’m glad things came up and brought distance between us…

    Now that I sit back and see,
    I cannot agree more with those pointing fingers at you because of who you are,
    rather,
    what sort of a person you are…

    I’m glad and breathe in peace,
    That,
    There won’t be any fingers pointed at me,
    for the fact that I am still in contact with you…!

    (P.s.
    I might have been in contact with you once,
    but,
    all of our connections are long gone,

    And I have not a single speck of regret for that…!)

    Cheers 🥂

    Love Waakiye 🤍